"When God's Timing Doesn't Match Instagram's Timeline"
The first thing I do every morning is thank God for another day. Before my feet hit the floor, before I check the time, before anything else. It's become this quiet ritual, this moment between me and Him where nothing else exists yet.
And then I pick up my phone.
Within thirty seconds I'm watching another photographer announce they're fully booked through spring. Someone else just posted their third styled shoot this month. And there's that girl who started six months after me, apparently doing this full-time now while I'm still trying to squeeze sessions in between my day job and everything else.
That peaceful gratitude I started with? It's still there. But let me tell you brother, it's easy to lose focus. Real easy.
Because suddenly I'm not thinking about glorifying God anymore. I'm thinking about why I'm not booked out. Why my feed doesn't look like theirs. Why I'm still editing at midnight after working all day while they're posting about their flexible schedules and creative freedom.
I have to stop myself and remember: I'm doing this to glorify God. Not to match someone else's timeline. Not to prove something on Instagram. Not even to go full-time, as much as I want that.
To Glorify God
The thing about being a Christian photographer with a day job is that you're constantly watching everyone else live your dream while you're clocking in at nine and editing until midnight. They post about their Tuesday morning shoots. You're on your lunch break trying to respond to inquiries. They talk about raising their prices and being selective with clients. You're just hoping someone books you at all so you can justify the gear you bought.
And the worst part? I know better. I literally just thanked God for another day. I know Instagram is a curated lie. I know He doesn't measure my worth by whether I'm full-time yet. I know comparison is supposed to be the thief of joy and all that.
But knowing it doesn't always stop the ache when you see someone else already living what you're still working toward. It doesn't always keep me focused on what actually matters.
And here's where it gets dangerous. We start doing things on our own. Desperately trying to push things forward instead of enjoying the moment God has made for us. We hustle harder. We say yes to everything. We stay up later. We post more. We network more. We invest in another course or another piece of gear or another marketing strategy because maybe this will be the thing that finally gets us there.
And it has a tendency to cause issues. Possibly in our relationships.
Your spouse asks if you're coming to bed and you snap because you're trying to finish editing and don't they understand you're building something here? Your kids want to play and you're distracted because you're refreshing your email again, waiting for that inquiry to turn into a booking. Your friends invite you out and you decline because you should be working on your business, even though you've been working on your business every spare minute for months and you're exhausted.
We're so busy trying to force God's hand that we miss what He's already given us. The people right in front of us. The life we have today, not the one we're working toward.
Psalm 37:7 says "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way."
Wait patiently. Don't fret over the one who prospers.
That hits different when you're scrolling through Instagram watching everyone else prosper while you're still waiting.
Here's what I'm learning though, slowly and painfully: God's plan for my business will never look like His plan for theirs. And maybe that means I'm not supposed to be full-time right now. Maybe it means I never will be, and that's not failure.
Because if I had their schedule, would I also have their financial stress? The panic when bookings slow down and there's no steady paycheck? The pressure to say yes to every client even when you're exhausted because you can't afford to turn down work?
If I didn't have my day job, would I have the freedom to be selective about the sessions I take? Would I be able to turn down work that doesn't align with my values because I desperately need the income? Would I resent photography the way you can resent anything when it has to pay all your bills?
And here's the real question: would I still be doing this to glorify God, or would it become about survival? Would I be so busy hustling that I'd damage the relationships He's blessed me with?
I'm not saying full-time photography isn't a legitimate dream. It is for me too. But I'm starting to wonder if the enemy uses that dream against us. Makes us feel like we're failing because we're not there yet. Makes us so focused on the destination that we miss what God is doing right here, right now, in the in-between. Makes us forget why we picked up a camera in the first place.
Makes us sacrifice today for a tomorrow that might not even be part of His plan.
"Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10.
Be still. Not hustle harder. Not push more. Not frantically try to make something happen because we're scared it never will.
Be Still
The Bible talks about running your own race, not looking side to side at what everyone else is doing. But man, it's hard when everyone else's race looks like they're miles ahead and you're still trying to find time to lace up your shoes.
So I'm trying something different. When I feel that comparison creep in, when I catch myself scrolling and thinking "why not me yet," I'm making myself stop and go back to that morning gratitude. The one I had before I picked up my phone. And I'm asking myself: am I still doing this to glorify God, or have I made it about something else without realizing it?
Am I enjoying the moment He's made for me, or am I too busy trying to push into the next one?
Am I being still, or am I fretting over the one who prospers?
Sometimes the answer stings a little.
Sometimes I realize I've been so focused on building a business that I forgot I'm supposed to be serving people. So worried about my pricing that I forgot I'm capturing families and memories and moments that matter. So jealous of someone else's success that I forgot God gave me this gift in the first place, and He doesn't need me to be full-time for it to count.
And sometimes I realize I've been so busy chasing the dream that I've been short with my family. Distracted during dinner. Absent even when I'm present. All because I'm trying to force something to happen on my timeline instead of trusting His.
Psalm 27:14 says "Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!"
Wait for the Lord. Not wait for the right marketing strategy. Not wait for the algorithm to favor you. Not wait for your big break.
Wait For The Lord
It's not about giving up on the dream. It's about not letting the dream replace the purpose. It's about trusting that if God wants me full-time, He'll make it clear and make it possible. And if He doesn't, maybe there's something in this tension, this juggling act, this tired but still showing up version of my business that's glorifying Him more than I realize.
Maybe there's something in being present with my family tonight that matters more than another hour of editing. Maybe there's something in resting instead of hustling that actually honors Him more than my desperate striving ever could.
Your Instagram feed will always make it look like everyone else has it figured out. Like they leaped into full-time and never looked back. They don't show you the credit card debt. The fights with their spouse about money. The burnout from shooting every weekend because they have to. The way they miss their old coworkers sometimes or the stability of a regular paycheck.
And they definitely don't show you whether they're still doing it for the right reasons, or if somewhere along the way it became about something else entirely. They don't show you what it cost them to get there.
I'm not saying their life is worse. I'm saying it's different, and different isn't better or worse. It's just different. And their different isn't the assignment God gave me.
God's writing a story for you that probably includes this day job for longer than you want. One that includes tired Tuesdays and editing sessions at midnight and wondering when you'll catch a break. One that might look small and scrappy compared to everyone else's announcements.
But it's yours. And if you're doing it to glorify Him, then it's exactly what it's supposed to be. Right now. Today.
And the people in your life? They're part of that story too. They're not obstacles to your success. They're the reason the success matters in the first place.
I suppose one day things will just start working. The bookings will come. The business will grow. Maybe I'll go full-time, maybe I won't. But whatever happens, it won't be on my timing.
It'll Be on His
And honestly? That's the only timeline that actually matters. The only one that won't cost me everything else while I'm chasing it.
So maybe the goal isn't to stop wanting more. Maybe it's just to catch ourselves when we lose focus, take a breath, and remember why we started. Remember that morning gratitude we woke up with. Remember that we're doing this to glorify God, not to keep up with everyone else's highlight reel.
Remember that He's already given us so much to be grateful for, right here, right now, in this exact moment. And maybe we should actually enjoy it instead of being so desperate to get to the next one.
Be still. Wait for the Lord. Don't fret over the one who prospers.
And maybe, just maybe, trust that He's got this. Even when Instagram makes it look like He forgot about us.
He Didn't
And the people who love us? They're still here too. Let's not forget about them while we're busy chasing everyone else's dream.
